Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
two words...techno handjob
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
