So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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