with your own penis?
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Randomize
