Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
