Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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