come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
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