therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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