How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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