I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
