so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
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