Whoa Z and x make the same sound
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
