He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
