i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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