I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
