idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
