Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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