belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize