Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(941): View more from Florida

so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow

Fav 15 3684 854
share tweet
(204): View more from Manitoba

The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.

Fav 26 5989 1864
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(202): View more from Washington, DC

My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.

Fav 15 7652 1357
share tweet
(404): View more from Georgia

just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.

Fav 10 2104 3926
share tweet
19 Worst Song Lyrics of All Time
Read it at the TFLN blog
(248): View more from Michigan

Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.

Fav 12 3596 1083
share tweet
(317): View more from Indiana

Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?

Fav 10 867 3624
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(207): View more from Maine

Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.

Fav 3 1399 948
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(701): View more from North Dakota

We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.

Fav 0 520 825
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(713): View more from Texas

MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.

Fav 5 49 38
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT