My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Ladies don't puke and tell
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
