She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
A+ Viking dick
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
