another moral hangover. fuck.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Randomize
