Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Randomize
