If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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