so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
