So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
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if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
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This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
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