Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I'm too high and old for this...
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
