My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize