She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
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