do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
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