just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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