Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
