we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
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his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
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Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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