I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize
