so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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