There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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