I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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