I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Randomize
