You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
