At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
