I heard we made out
sarcasm needs its own font
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
