shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
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