Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
