Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
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I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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