This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.