I can tuck mytits in my pants
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize
