Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
30 People Reveal The Moment They Realized: ‘Oh Sh*t, I’m An A**hole’
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
30 Tiny Celebrity Tattoos You’ll Want To Run Out And Copy ASAP
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.