I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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