so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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