That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
She told me I should be a condom model.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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