he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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