talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
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